Even in Barcelona there are Good and Bad Days
Hola!
Yesterday
marked a month since I first arrived in Barcelona. The juxtaposition of the previous
two weeks has further heightened my faith assuming that when things go bad,
they will always fix themselves. After a couple of failed attempts to attend
work, the week before last left me house bound for most of it´s entirety. I
felt myself getting ill, and by Tuesday I had already lost my voice. The school
was great, and very understanding. They comforted me with the knowledge of past
assistants also getting ill in the first few weeks and demanded I went home and
rest. I felt annoyed at myself that I was already having to take days off from
the school when I hadn´t even got the chance to meet all of the students yet. However,
there was no way that I could have even forced myself to speak loudly, let
alone display enthusiasm as well.
In most
cases when we are ill, we feel drained and our emotions become more apparent.
We like the comfort of our own bed, our own house and family, but experiencing
being ill in another house, hundreds of miles from my own, wasn´t quite the
same. As I mentioned in my previous post, I am very lucky with my host family, they
are really fun, easy-going and also sympathetic. The reality of illness was a
cold, a very temperamental and inconvenient cold, but alongside that I suffered
from migraines. I am prone to headaches and migraines. I often get headaches at
least once a week, even when I do my best to avoid them. Some people are
fortunate in that they do not suffer from them; mine sometimes
like to hang around for a few days…they´re extremely clingy. Sometimes I can
cope with headaches, but when they develop from the annoyance stage to just a
huge pain in the ass, they become unbearable, leaving me pretty useless.
I hadn´t
felt too homesick until this point. I began worrying about everything, and for
someone that worries a lot, when I start, it takes a lot for me to stop. I just
wanted someone I was comfortable with and could sit with in person and vent to,
but this wasn´t possible. I doubted my perseverance to continue the program for
eight months, and I guess this is reasonable. It is a long time, as much as I
try to persuade myself that it isn´t however it´s already been a month. At
first the weeks seemed slow, but now they are flying by. It´s probably because ´time
flies when you´re having fun´, and perhaps at first I wasn’t sure how I felt. So
being ill resulted in a lot of negative thoughts, but the beginning of the
following week I was almost a hundred percent. My energy levels had returned to
normal, and in addition my negative moods had nearly vanished.
Last week
was a good week! I had fun at the school and enjoyed interacting with the
students. I really feel that I have settled in here and actually began to make
friends. ”Ooo friend. Barcelona friend.” You totally have to be an Inbetweeners
fan to get that. Honestly though, having friends makes a big difference. I
wondered if I would meet people that I would feel comfortable with, and I think
I am starting to. You may be curious as to how it´s possible to get lonely when
you are constantly surrounded by kids and teachers at the school, or your host
family, and as much as I adore them all, it´s not the same. It´s important to
take some time-out from the more obvious parts of the experience associated
with the school and family, and just chill out with people whilst enduring your
age. I am still only 21, I need to explore, drink, socialize with strangers, and
make stories that will be stories to tell for years.
Unfortunately
in Barcelona you need to be careful, much like many foreign cities, but the rumours
you hear are true; there is a lot of pick pocketing and other such crimes. This
makes me incredibly aware of myself, and increases my alcohol age to higher
than it used to be back in England. This is probably the part that is the most
disappointing. More often than none, you can enjoy a night with no drama, but sometimes
things do happen, and that fear is always leering in the back of my mind. This
program means that a lot of us are situated in different areas of Barcelona
city, and outside of it, meaning that we are often finding our way home alone
at night. Sadly there is nothing we can
do about this, but we just have to take more care. It´s frustrating but as we
are pictured as tourists we are the main target. I´d like to think I know my
way now and show confidence in my body language as I walk the streets of
Barcelona, but sometimes my skin and general appearance is too much of a give
away.
Right now, I
am so excited for two events. The first being Thursday because that´s when my
friends arrive. I cannot wait to have Matt, Rhys and Jason here for the weekend
and to go out with them and some people from the program. I know this weekend
is going to be a good one. These boys have become pretty close friends of mine
since I met them in summer, and they are a lot of fun to go out with, even
thinking about it now is getting me pumped for the weekend.ç
The second
event is the 19th December, the day that I fly home for Christmas! I
booked my flights home for Christmas back in August because it was incredibly
cheap. I originally booked to fly home on the 23rd, but after
talking to my school, I have changed my flight (booked another) to the 19th
so that I have an extra four days in England. It will be worth the extra 50
euros. I wanted to be able to have more of the run up to Christmas at home. Even
though I´m not a huge Christmas person, I feel this year may finally be a good
one, with a lot of positive feelings as there isn´t that much I can fault about
2014. I can´t wait to catch up with friends and see my family. I don’t have a
lot of time to contact people here as I´m busy Monday to Friday with school
during the day, Spanish lessons on the evenings of Mondays and Wednesdays, then
trying to include family time and occasionally meeting with other assistants.
However,
although I´m excited I´m coming home I also like that I think I am going to
miss Barcelona, and hopefully be looking forward to coming back. Except for the
fact I do not want to move families, I say this without any knowledge of my
second family yet. I live in a perfect location and I have so much fun with my
family. The children are adorable and always make me laugh even if the twin
boys don´t speak a lot of English. The six year old girl makes the most effort.
We do Spanish/English lessons where we exchange words and sentences. As for the
parents, the fact that they went out drinking at the weekend and ended up in a
club called Jamboree ´til half 4, whilst I was home by 3 gives you an inkling
of their personalities. Also, during the week we always have the funniest
conversations at dinner before moving to the sofa to watch another episode of
Orange is the New Black. I just don’t feel ready for my routine to change yet. I´m
sure my next family will be just as great so I´m trying not to worry. My experience
with my first family has proved to me how easily I can make myself at home in
someone else´s family.
It won´t
always be easy; the language barrier is my biggest problem. It was the host
Mum´s birthday at the weekend and they organized a surprise birthday party. It
was from 2-7:30, and in between this time there were a few intervals of me
standing awkwardly pretending to understand, or just sitting on my own. It´s
not a case of being shy but instead, physically being unable to communicate
with people. If I don´t stop myself now, this will lead to a huge rant about
how I wish we were pushed more to learn another language and that the majority
of native English speakers are insanely lazy with only speaking our mother-tongue.
Perhaps I will leave that for an entirely separate blog post…
Overall,
I´m feeling really happy here and I have settled in well. It’s normal and
justifiable that some weeks or days will be better than others just like with
any person´s life, but I think the good days and week will always override the
rest. It´s similar to the comparison of a bad student and a good student,
because yes, a bad student may piss you off, but then a good student will
quickly wipe away that annoyance and have an impact on you. Admittedly I
haven´t had many bad students at all. There are too many lovely students! One
thing I never understand is why the students that make the most effort in
school were almost always looked down on, or made to feel vulnerable.
There was a
boy in a class who’s English is such a high standard for his age, and he always
goes to extra lengths with his work, but his partner for an activity decided to
embarrass him by making jokes about his efforts, which resulted in the poor boy
crying. I felt so sorry for him, and attempted to put a smile on his face by
praising him. I guess you will know the difference between these kids when they´re
older, and who will be the more successful one. You can also guess straight
away which student I prefer out of these two…
I apologize
for my lack of posts, preferably I´d like to have written a post every week,
but I actually don´t have a lot of time to sit down and write. I have written
this post in my three hour lunch break today, so instead of sitting on Facebook
I have used my time more productively. Again, I will try not to leave it as
long next time, although I can´t make promises.
Take care,
Laura May.
Comments
Post a Comment